I hadn’t quite applied the change in myself that I had carefully manicured and adapted to suit my new life as a mother.
This is because no matter what there will always be a side to me that is hopeful, playful and likes to daydream. At first when I had Francis I desperately tried to let go of these traits worrying I was too old for wishful thinking and ambition – my time was up I had to put all my efforts into being the ‘perfect’ mother.
But thankfully after over a year of chasing perfection failing miserably and falling into a guilt ridden hole, I feel confident in myself both as a mother a friend and partner.
It’s this comfort that allows me to truly appreciate life and not just spend all my time worrying about pointless things.
Francis is 16 months almost!
He is a true blessing and although my hair is proof that motherhood can be tough (grey hair sprouting) it’s worth every late night, every tantrum and every dinner time drama.
Because at the end of everyday when Francis is peacefully sleeping I remind my self that I made him, and that’s a dream I already caught.